Fatten-U-Up

DAHLINGS -

This advertisement from 1891 has me positively wistful. If only this sort of fashion repeated itself!

"Fat" Necklaces On Sale At Fancy Lady Industries

DAHLINGS -

I believe in encouraging talent when I see it. Natalie Perkins, who writes the blog http://www.definatalie.com/, is a blogger and designer. She has designed a line of necklaces using the word "Fat".



Photo courtesy definatalie.com

Now, many women might feel uncomfortable wearing this necklace, but for those who are fat and proud, this just might be the perfect accessory for you. It comes in an array of colors. Look on her website to shop Fancy Lady Industries. Her personal story is inspiring, and I have no doubt we shall be seeing more of Ms. Perkins in the future.

Disclaimer: I only write about things I like. I am not paid for my posts.

Ciao,
Elisa

Sorry, I Don't Want An "Amazing Transformation!"

DAHLINGS –



Since the discovery that there were vast sums to be derived from making others feel inadequate, never has such high intelligence has been devoted to low self-esteem.



And never has technology had such effective tools to work with. Between CGI and Photoshop, women (and everybody else) have almost no access to unmediated images.



For example: when has Oprah EVER looked like one of her own magazine covers? It sickens moi when Oprah has those “empowering” title lines on her covers. “Be The Best You?” Then how about showing us the REAL You, Oprah? The woman who is overweight, with heavy arms. This is not meant as a criticism of Ms. Winfrey’s physique. It is a criticism of Ms. Winfrey’s holding herself out as an example. An example that is a LIE.



Ms. Winfrey believes that her bazillions of followers will not buy her magazines if Oprah Winfrey actually looks like Oprah Winfrey.



The mind boggles. In fact, it makes my head hurt if I think about this too much.



Larger lovelies are further marginalized not only by Oprah having herself halved in size, but also the eradication of any and all normal flaws in media images. We are so ceaselessly bombarded by smooth, creamy perfection at every turn that oneself cannot measure up. Even the perfect people are not perfect enough. In television and movies, no wrinkles, bulges, unsightly moles, body hair, bra lines, panty lines, a dress wrinkled in the waist and skirt from sitting down—thanks to CGI, “all gone!” as a friend of mine says to her shiba inu when lunch is done.



To reach out to larger lovelies and spread the word, http://www.aboutcurves.com/ is having a charity drive for NAAFA (National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance). They have asked plus-size bloggers to write, and I am proud to do so. Even if, as always, I'm slightly late. Click the link for more information:



http://www.aboutcurves.com/charity





Before I write anything else, there is one item I must get off my ample chest: if I meet the people behind the Victoria’s Secret ad campaigns and catalogs, there would be blood on the streets. Even the gaunt Dachau victims that lurch down the runways during Fashion Week are more realistic than those pencils with false breasts. Victoria’s Secret has it all…One can feel bad about being skinny, flat-chested, large-chested, heavy, tall, short…any woman that does not look like these bizarre hybrids. And the quality of their merchandise is far lower than their prices would indicate.



The name “Victoria’s Secret” brings to mind the image of a young Victorian female, all plush curves and dimpled elbows. Beautiful lingerie enhancing the splendor of an actual human body. Sensual fabrics on sexual females. The hint of a double chin above a soft neck. Long hair spilled across a satin pillowcase.



Thousands of ads toting exercise machines, DVDs, pills, programs, all guaranteed to make you lose weight and keep it off. Sometimes I wonder:

a) Why have I never met anyone personally who underwent such a transformation?

b) If all of those hordes of “afters” are thin, how can there be any fat people left, logistically speaking?



You might think this is a “been there, done that” tirade. We have been there. We have done that. But never as completely. Never as unremittingly. Women are trained from the cradle to think of themselves as physically inadequate in some way. Heavy women even more so. Now, overweight isn't only overweight, it is a crime against humanity. At least according to TMZ and their ilk.



Where are the role models for larger lovelies? Every time a heavy beauty has a career breakthrough…she sheds poundage. And since said beauty has always given publicity about “loving myself the way I am”, the frantic backtracking becomes comic to watch. “Yes, I did love myself at that weight, but life can be enjoyed at any size!” THEN WHY DID YOU LOSE SIXTY POUNDS, BITCH? (Yes, I’m looking at you, Jessica Hudson. I know there are others. But I’m looking at you.)



We are betrayed at every turn. America Ferrera started “Ugly Betty” as a larger lovely, but grew progressively thinner as the show’s run went on. Singer Jordin Sparks is ´delighted´ to have lost weight. Media websites love to run slideshows of “Amazing Transformations!”



That’s another peeve. You don’t lose weight. You have “An Amazing Transformation!” “Complete Body Makeover!” Good God, it makes me long for the days when the goal of losing weight was well…losing weight. Buy a smaller bra. Wear pleats. Can we ever go back? If we're going to make abortion illegal again, while we're at it, can't we go back to excess poundage not being a mortal sin?



Pardon the pun: Fat chance. My apologies if this rambles a bit, but I have low blood sugar. I am going to go eat a chocolate cupcake. In public.



Ciao,

Elisa

Jennifer Hudson May Be Thin, But...

DAHLINGS -

I have avoided the topic of Jennifer Hudson as a spokesperson for Weight Watchers. Although I believe that we shall have Kirstie Alley 2.0 on our hands in a few years. (After all, didn't sports commentator Mike Golic shed pounds on Nutrisystem, gain it all back and is now shilling for another weight loss gambit? Twas ever thus.)

However, this photo of Ms. Hudson at LAX simply cried out for commentary:



Not only because of the madly unflattering combination of leggings and tight purple lace shirt, not only because of the camel toe, but also the fact that Ms. Hudson can be clearly seen wearing SPANX underneath all of that. Good God, woman, why bother losing all of the weight if you still feel obligated to wear constricting undergarments?

Your faithful correspondent is not recommending constricting undergarments, although she has been known to wear waist cinchers when in vintage dresses. But truly, what is the point of being held up as an example of slenderness if you still have to wear Spanx? Or feel that you have to wear Spanx? Isn't the point of the exercise to not wear Spanx?

Just an idle, slightly outraged thought, dahlings. Feel free to have your say in the comments section.

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Marissa Jaret Winokur Fired For Being Too Fat For Plus-Sized Show

DAHLINGS -

Recently we in the plus-sized community have getting all warm and fuzzy about fashion magazines including plus-sized models. Including, believe it or not, Karl Lagerfeld photographing burlesque star Dirty Martini.

Now comes the news that Oxygen is replacing the host of their successful show Dance Your Ass Off, Tony winner Marissa Jaret Winokur, with a skinny host.


Marissa Jaret Winokur
Photograph courtesy of ABC

The show features male and female contestants perfecting their dance moves as they also try to lose weight. The goal is not to become thin per se, but to become graceful in their bodies. And to bring them out from under the cloud of shame many large people feel about themselves and to enjoy performing before an audience.

As Winokur herself did on Dancing With The Stars.


Photographycourtesy of ABC

Yes, one of the few shows about overweight people that didn't pander to the audience has decided that former Spice Girl Melanie Brown is "a better fit" and "more relatable" to the show's audience.

What? Have we again descended into that parallel universe that is the media? Of course we have. When she was about to host the program, Winokur said in an interview with TV Guide:
“[Those other shows] are more like boot camps. This isn’t like boot camp. This is people finding their sexuality and embracing life in a different way. They’re finding their femininity or masculinity,” said Winokur. “They dance to the scale — that’s how it’s different than Biggest Loser. It’s not a walk of shame to the scale.”

With Melanie Brown as the host, the fundamental balance of the show changes. Instead of a woman who is large and comfortable with her size, they will have a host who represents everything they are supposed to be in traditional show business. Rather than who they are.

How will the contestants feel, being publicly weighed by this woman, whose very presence is a slap in the face to plus-sized people everywhere?


Melanie Brown
Photograph courtesy of The Sun

In fact, the above photograph was used for promotion in 2008 for Melanie Brown's fitness video, Totally Fit, which also came with a 23-day "slim plan".

Dance Your Ass Off was a ratings success for Oxygen last season. Let's only hope it goes to the basement, along with Brown's last reality show, The Singing Office.

Remember that? No, of course you don't.

Shame on Oxygen, shame on the production company, and particularly, shame on Lisa Ann Walter, one of the executive producers, who frequently mentioned her own struggles with weight on the air.

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Must Plus-Size Clothes Be Shapeless? NO!

DAHLINGS -


It distresses me greatly when I see what is offered to my sisters in bounteousness. Recently I glanced through some catalogs a reader sent me.

It was a revelation: most of what is out there is ugly. Many plus-sized women already know that, but your faithful correspondent had rarely been face to face with the dressing challenges that affect these women.


1) Where are all of the models THIN? With a few notable exceptions (Just My Size, which has some of the ugliest clothing I have ever encountered), the models are stringbeans, which only makes the garments look worse. Once I sent a protest to what used to be Lane Bryant--it has now renamed itself Woman Within--only to be sent the response that the customers demanded thin models! I think not. A glance at the dozens of plus-size fashion blogs puts paid to that idiotic idea.



2) Death to dusters, overblouses, and enormous shapeless dresses! Even if one is a size 8X, a woman deserves clothing that makes her feel beautiful. Even manufacturers I respect, such as Silhouettes, make baggy dresses that scream, "I Hate My Body!"



(Why do the models in this sort of catalog always look so INSANELY happy? Are they on drugs?)

So, here are a few items that actually celebrate the body. This particular selection is from Silhouettes, although you can also find some very sexy body-hugging pieces at http://www.jessicalondon.com/.

First, this faux wrap dress. Whatever your size, it will flatter your curves and the v-neckline draws attention to the face and neck in the best way.

Second, another wrap dress, this one with a pretty full skirt for those who would prefer not to wear something clingy. The print is subtle, unlike the shrieking color combinations on cheaper clothing.




















Third, a stretch sheath dress. While I do wish it had sleeves, the mere fact that Silhouettes is willing to do a stretch sheath dress is praise enough!





















Fourth, to go with it, a fitted blazer with a feminine ruffled collar. One hopes the single button close does NOT mean the jacket is in the fly-away style. It appears to be fitted--what a concept!





















Fifth, a piece that caught my eye immediately and was the inspiration for this entry: a colorblocked sweatercoat. Note the figure-enhancing cut. Again, unlike baggy crew-neck sweaters that plague so many catalogs.




















Sixth, just because I love them and they come in size 11WW, these embellished flats.









I tried photographing Bucky with them some months ago, but it, er, didn't come out as I had hoped.

















You can find these all of these goodies at http://www.silhouettes.com/.

Please bear in mind that I ONLY write about thing I like, never "advertorials" My integrity as a fashion goddess is at stake, you know.

I would prefer that you shop with moi, but if not, I highly recommend these alternatives!

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Lincoln University's Racist Fat Discriminatory Policy

DAHLINGS –

Fat discrimination never ends, does it? Why is it news when a fat person dies, when millions more are dying of lung cancer? It is because “Man Dies Of Lung Cancer In Recliner” doesn’t make for a snappy headline?

Your faithful correspondent was outraged to read today in the Huffington Post that Lincoln University has instituted a policy that not only do students have to take a mandatory physical fitness class to be considered eligible for graduation—but also must have a Body Mass Index of under 30! Otherwise they will not graduate.

I have to admit that I have never cared enough to find out what exactly BMI is or why it matters so much. (“The Biggest Loser” uses it, but anyone who appears on that farce is already a loser.)

Not only is this policy discriminatory toward those whose body mass is greater than the approved amount; all of the two dozen students who will not graduate are African-American.

The name Lincoln University has become a joke. What would Abraham Lincoln make of this idiotic, inequitable policy that affects so many young people who have studied and worked for their diplomas? Is the university letting anorexics graduate, or do they have to have a BMI above 3? Somehow I think the deluded officials responsible for this monstrosity don’t care which students have bulimia (after all, they tend to be more photogenic, even if they faint a lot).

Here is a link to the Huffington Post article:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/11/24/too-fat-to-graduate-linco_n_370037.html

In turn it links to a suitably judgemental article by an African-American woman criticizing the students for being overweight. So comforting to know that this sort of discrimination is embraced by the African-American community. Don't they have problems enough??

Shame on you, Lincoln University! Shame on the press outlets that publicize this sort of article with shots of bulging waists.

Mon Dieu, I have to go and have my maid dab my temples with eau-de-cologne. And than I shall dine on a large breakfast of bacon, eggs and buttermilk biscuits to show my solidarity (and because it is delicious).

"Ruby" - A Member of the Public Speaks Out

DAHLINGS -

I have refrained from writing about the television show Ruby. Even as I applaud her efforts to fight morbid obesity, I also know that she is one of the executive producers of the show, created the show along with a partner, and found an interested production company.

It was no miracle that Ruby Gettinger found herself on the nation's television sets: it is a carefully crafted program. Ruby controls what we see, unlike most participants on reality shows (pace More To Love). While she is very brave...I can see the hate mail coming now...I have to say that this post on a discussion board sums up my problems with Ruby far better than I could.

I have watched Ruby over the last season and of course I congratulate her on her weight loss, but with the help she has received with her TEAM, I feel anyone could have done it.

I also lost approximately 165 pound and did it with no expensive TEAM. I had no shrink, no trainers, no tennis instructors, no nutritionists and no special foods. I resent the fact that I as a tax paying citizen of this country paid for all this high class assistance.** I decided on my own to improve my heath status. Reading through the lines I understand Ruby was collecting disability payments for years. This made her eligible for Medicaid or state paid health care. My exercise consisted of hard work, and mentally getting my act together. No shrink need for that. I ate the proper foods and cooked them myself. No nutritionist for me. No fancy vacations for me. I was paying my own bills. I have kept the weight off for 15 years and weigh 160 pounds and look great. But I am most proud of achieving this on my own. What has happened to PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY.

** The part of this post I disagree with is thinking that Ruby Gettinger paid for any part of this show with taxpayer's money. And she probably did not seek medical help because of her deep shame about her body. Unfortunately, many overweight women suffer from this problem (thinner women as well).

The Team was paid for by the producers of the show, and have reaped not only financial benefits but an enormous amount of publicity. Never discount the lure of appearing on television. And have you noticed that Ruby not only has enormous personal charisma, she is extremely pretty?


Ruby with, fittingly enough, Oprah, the Queen of Self-Loathing

Your faithful correspondent doubts that a producer would have taken on a long-term series such as Ruby if the overweight woman was plain and had a pronounced double chin and fat neck. (It does not photograph well.)

Pardon my cynicism, but I have been around the television block many times. And no, I have no desire for my own reality show. I am already quite famous enough, thank you. No, I am not jealous of Ruby's weight loss. And no, I am not a man.

Back to New York Fashion Week!

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Glamour To Do "Plus-Size" Model Photo Spread

DAHLINGS -

I am slack-jawed with amaze. After Glamour magazine published a nude photo of a normal woman (although far thinner than most of the sisterhood), the magazine was flooded with approving mail, thanking them!

After all of the constant weight-bashing lately, this comes as a breath of fresh air.

Sensing a trend, for its upcoming November issue, Glamour assigned photographer Matthias Vriens to shoot a photo spread of the model again, along with her plus-size model counterparts Kate Dillon, Jennie Runk, Amy Lemons, Ashley Graham, Anansa Sims (daughter of the first black woman to appear on the cover of Vogue, Beverly Johnson)!


Kate Dillon


For the full article, by Katie Hintz Zambrano, please read here:

http://www.stylelist.com/blog/2009/09/01/the-people-have-spoken-more-nude-plus-size-models/?icid=main

If nothing else, I would like to find out the identity of the annoying model who simpers, "Thanks, Playtex!" at the end of those television commercials.

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Jessica Gottlieb Can Dish It Out, But She Can't Take It

DAHLINGS -

My idle reference to bitch-slapping Jessica Gottlieb has gotten the "Mommy Blogger" (whatever that is) into quite a stew! The reference was due to her recent blogpost, "Fat Acceptance Is Bullshit." Need I say more? (I refrain from such vulgar language--it is a barrier to intelligent discourse. Of course "bitch-slapping" is rather declasse', but I was fatigued.)

It's worth it to go on Twitter to see her foaming at the mouth over little old moi. I'm quite flattered, really. Ms. Gottlieb not only called me a variety of names, she even posted a link to my last blog post so that people could bear witness to what "the troll" wrote about her. Even if it was only a passing reference in my blog post devoted to PETA. Apparently, she's that important.

In her post, Ms. Gottlieb wrote:

I’m tired of hearing people equating obesity with race, hence the discrimination.
I can’t carry my 7 year old on my back all day long and still have a good quality day. He’s 50 pounds or so. Many of you “fat acceptance” bloggers have lots more than 50 pounds on you. Stop pretending it’s okay. You are dying and some of you are killing your kids. That has me irate.
It’s got to suck to be morbidly obese. I can’t imagine laboring to get out of bed, oh, wait I can, you see I was HUGE when I was pregnant. It’s not a way to live your life.
...fat acceptance is kinda like cancer acceptance. You’re killing yourself and you sound like an asshole when you talk about it.

from: "Fat Acceptance Is Bullshit" at http://jessicagottlieb.com**

And then she's surprised when a plus-sized person takes offense?? Methinks she doth protest too much. In a previous post she admitted she's not a size 4, that she's a curvy woman with some "goo," whatever that means. For "goo," read "serious body issues."

It's ridiculous to have to write this, but here we go: I believe in limiting the consumption of fat and sugar for children. I do not eat fast food. I do not believe in gastric bypasses for teenagers, any more than I believe in breast implants for those too young to vote. However, like any normal person, I take great pleasure in eating delicious well-prepared healthy food (and the occasionally unhealthy food). And I love my body. It's strong, it works well, and it certainly has an excellent capacity for sexual enjoyment.

Ms. Gottlieb has indicated on her blog that I am a coward and a bully, and that until I apologize, she has nothing but contempt for me. Since she already has contempt for my body, she might as well have contempt for my point of view. Personally, I'm flattered my opinion means so much to her.

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky The Wonderdog

** Edited to Add: Ms. Gottlieb tweeted that I cut and pasted without attribution. I'm beginning to believe this woman has a serious problem. Doesn't she have better things to do with her time, like, say, making sport of blind people?

PETA'S PR Dept. Are A Bunch Of Fatheads**

DAHLINGS:

It simply never ends. Your faithful correspondent is honestly beginning to develop a case of "outrage fatigue." And yet how else can one react to PETA's latest billboard??



Do they honestly think this will influence anyone to give up eating meat? This organization has never been known for political correctness, but to stoop to fat-bashing is simply low. They have tried this approach before, without any discernible success, such as this 2002 billboard:




Apparently People for Ethical Treatmentof Animals don't believe that ethical treatment extends to the "People" part. As much as I support their cause, they have been removed from my personal charity list. Would they prefer that women look like this?

One can be fairly certain that a ham sandwich (or anything else, for that matter) has never passed this model's lips.

There is nothing more to say, for me at least. I am disgusted, disappointed, and now feel politically compelled to eat a sandwich made from whatever endangered species my chef has in the pantry. I am profoundly saddened that an organization I once respected feels the need to gratuitously single us out once again. There are quite a few overweight vegetarians out there, believe it or not. Is Wendy's slapping them on billboards saying "Eat a burger, for God's sake!"?

Comments are welcomed, however, personal abuse will not be printed.

** Pun intended.

Ciao,

Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

P.S. Could somebody please bitch-slap Jessica Gottlieb? I'm too tired.

Now Cintra Wilson Knows How It Feels To Be Fat

DAHLINGS -

Poor Cintra Wilson. Since writing her cruel, snide review of J.C. Penney for The New York Times a few days ago, the Internet has been roiling with rage. Directed at her, for the most part. (If you need more information, please read my previous entry.)

She apologized on her blog three times, first mentioning she'd interviewed Beth Ditto ("Some of my best friends are fat people!"), then telling her readers to get the knot out of their panties. When neither of those apologies assuaged anyone, the Times apparently ordered her to take a big-girl pill (pun intended) and issue a radiantly insincere apology:

Because of my personal beliefs as a Buddhist, I very much regret that my JC Penney article in the Times caused any wounded feelings whatsoever, particularly to people who already feel they take more than their share of abuse from our very shallow and ridiculous society.

Your faithful correspondent admits to her lack of knowledge about Buddhism. It's something to do with not owning anything and staring into space while uttering profound aphorisms, I think. Because of my personal beliefs as an atheist, I very much regret that Ms. Wilson, as an abusive member of our shallow and ridiculous society, writes for The New York Times.

As does nearly everyone else with a keyboard, apparently. The blogosphere is filled with rants; everything from calling Ms. Wilson a horse-faced crack whore to calling her critics fat slobs in sweat pants who drive up the cost of health care.

One hastens to add that I have written neither of these things. I prefer civilized discourse. Although yes, I have contributed to the discussion on a number of blogs.

What fascinates me, because I am the center of my universe, is the amount of hate mail I have received since my previous entry. Since I have been dictating this blog-thing for three years or more, I have long since become inured to being called a "fat twat", a "retard", a "stoopid snob who dont know anthing"[sic]. Perhaps I should have published the comments I have received, since they have veered quite far from the standard insults I receive.

Two commenters are convinced I am actually a man.
One commenter said I was robbing Mr. Blackwell's grave. I still don't know what that means. Should I be offended or proud?
Three commenters wrote [paraphrasing] that I should shut my fat hole up/stuff my mouth with food and write about something I know something about.

In a way, I actually feel bad for Ms. Wilson. Now she's having a double-sized portion (again, pun intended) of how most plus-sized women feel treated by society all of the time. Especially by the fashion establishment and the media.

Her mistake was to publish an article in The New York Times that was the equivalent of those signs one sees in taverns of the the more sordid sort: "No Fat Chicks".

I promise to move on to happier topics, such as the lovely holiday line coming soon from Silhouettes!

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Cintra Wilson "Hates On" Normal Women In The New York Times

DAHLINGS -

Two days ago, Cintra Wilson, a writer for The New York Times, wrote a perceptive yet deeply insulting article about the opening of (gack) J.C. Penney in the Manhattan Mall. In her "Critical Shopper" column, "Playing To The Middle," Ms. Wilson quite accurately writes about the cheap designer knock-offs the store traffics in:

Since the 1970s, J. C. Penney, like a retail Island of Dr. Moreau, has been doing a sinister experiment with various designers, turning them into something ... not quite human. The plot is a fashion democratization known as “masstige,” which sounds gynecological, but is a marketing term created by a fusion of “mass” and “prestige.” It refers to a downward brand extension: designers compelled to put their good names on down-market lines of “affordable luxury.” (Read: items in cheaper materials, sold at lower prices.)

She goes on to name the various designers, some of them completely obscure, who do "masstige" lines for the store, including Kimora Lee Simmons.

However, the majority of Ms. Wilson's article takes deadly aim at the, er, larger-sized customers that flock to J.C. Penney's. She laments the lack of size 2s in stock, but is shocked, shocked to find clothes in 10, 12 and 16! She sees this as a stroke of diabolical marketing genius, particularly where the displays are concerned:

It has made a point of providing clothing for people of all sizes (a strategy, company officials have said, to snatch business from nearby Macy’s). To this end, it has the most obese mannequins I have ever seen. They probably need special insulin-based epoxy injections just to make their limbs stay on. It’s like a headless wax museum devoted entirely to the cast of “Roseanne.”

Purely gratuitous fat-bashing, don't you think? This sort of unthinking "skinny superiority" absolutely enrages me, I do not mind telling you.

Ms. Wilson is a body snob of the worst kind. Of course, most fashion people are body snobs (pace Karl Lagerfeld), but to me, "Playing To The Middle" hits below the belt. It makes me want to slap Ms. Wilson and then force-feed her a giant chocolate cannoli from Veniero's. And then not let her go to the gym to work it off.

Oh, she throws in how delighted shoppers are to vote with their money for a store not for exercise-crazed skeletons. (Of which, apparently, she is one.) But she still cannot keep herself from making more snide comments about the customers:

No matter how many Grand Slam breakfasts you’ve knocked out of the park, Penney’s has a size for you. Ladies will find kicky little numbers that fit no matter how bountiful the good Lord made them; in the men’s Big & Tall section, even Voltron could find office casuals.

The Good Lord may have made many women bountiful, but He has certainly made Ms. Wilson's mind tiny, petty and mean.

I welcome your comments, dear readers, both pro and con.

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

You can read the full article here: http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/13/fashion/13CRITIC.html?_r=1&ref=style

"More To Love" And The Reality of Reality TV

DAHLINGS -

Reality shows, it must be noted, are far from reality. As most of my savvy readers know, “reality” is manipulated and edited to suit what the producers of the show are looking to show. Some of the contestants of Project Runway are kept on because they have fascinating personalities, while the less camera-friendly designers are let go. And many shows rely on keeping the participants isolated from outside contact as much as possible.

Imagine the pressure of having your every move filmed for television, trapped inside a house for weeks, and in some cases not allowed to interact with your fellow cast-members off-camera. (I learned that from a former Survivor cast member; there were employees specially hired to prevent the contestants from speaking to each other between takes!)

So it was with more than a fair share of skepticism that I approached More To Love, a reality show that features an overweight but appealing man, Luke Conley, who is 6'3" and weighs over 300 pounds. He has to choose between twenty overweight and appealing women.




I should warn you that all of the photos have been Photoshopped beyond belief.


Now, reality dating shows have a peculiar, outdated view of romance and marriage, of meeting “the one true love” and living happily ever after. How on earth is that supposed to “reality”? Especially within the confines of the genre. More To Love is no exception.

This might be feminist heresy, but I have to disagree with the critics who say the women were presented as “pathetic” and “otherized.” With the exception of a few bad fashion choices, all of the women were presented as sexy, pretty, and intelligent (again with a few exceptions). They stepped out of black limos in colorful evening gowns, hair perfect, makeup camera-ready, in sky-high heels. **











Some of them could have been pop idols; in fact one woman is a plus-size model, as is the strangely underused host, Emme. I admire Emme tremendously, pardon the pun. But she is only on for a few minutes at the beginning and the end, and seems slightly uncomfortable during the proceedings.



One hopes that during the show’s run she will help these women with their low self-esteem. In one on one interviews, each woman talked about what she wanted in a mate, her dating history, her feelings about her body, etc. What saddened moi was the self-hatred these women had for themselves. They didn’t seem to understand that the mere fact that they were on this show meant that they were far better-looking than average! In fact, quite a few were attractive in that slightly bland style television demands.




They focused on their large bodies as the reason they have/had been dateless. Most reality show contestants are deeply insecure. Why else would they be reality show contestants? But these women wore their hearts on their chiffon sleeves. Why on earth did they think a television show would be their “last chance for love”?

Here I would like to assert that my avoirdupois has never been an obstacle to dating, sex, multiple marriages, or any pleasurable interaction with the male sex. But then, I am a woman of broad mind and loose morals. There were some contestants who were comfortable with their size and happy with their bodies, which was a refreshing change.

At the end, ten women were sent packing, and this is one aspect of reality television I despise: the exit interview. Many of the women being sent home were completely devastated, and the cameras feasted on their devastation.

Many critics have said that More To Love is all about humiliating fat women.

What they do not take into account is that most reality television is, ultimately, about humiliating everyone. Where is the dignity in The Bachelor? Survivor? Big Brother?

Although I have reservations about More To Love, in the end I have to say that I believe it levels the playing field just a tiny bit.

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky The Wonderdog


**Fashion Note :

Unlike MAKEOVER reality shows, More To Love did not dress the women in lookalike dark colored empire dresses. Their gowns ran the color and design spectrum, and some even had--gasp--natural waistlines!

Oprah Winfrey, SHUT UP About Your Weight!

DAHLINGS –

Yesterday on CNN, I watched aghast as Oprah Winfrey tearfully confessed how “embarrassed” she was to attend a photo op with Tyra Banks and some other woman. Or maybe some other two women; I was a bit distracted by sheer irritation.

Because Oprah's shame was because she had—wait for it—gained weight. Never mind that she is one of the wealthiest, most powerful, and yes, the most glamorous women in the known universe! The fool wants to be Chanel Iman in the bargain.

Oprah, dahling, if I were sitting opposite you on the set of your show, I would have one thing to say to you about your weight:

Shut up.

Well, maybe more than one thing:

You were not meant to be thin. Haven’t you learned that by now? Hasn’t the fact that you have to work harder than a Roman galley slave to stay below 200 pounds made you realize that you were not intended to be waifish? Or even slim? Both of these photos are less than a month old.



Why do you keep punishing yourself? Why do you keep hating yourself? And more important, as a voice that influences millions of Americans, why do you persist in helping other large men and women feel horrendous about themselves?



What is WRONG with you?

Why can't you be comfortable with your body, like Queen Latifah?



(Yes, I know she did those awful Jenny Craig commercials, that still baffles me.)

Enjoy your flesh, like Pierce Brosnan's wife Keely (and, it seems, Pierce)?




Since I am talking to Oprah, I shall make a personal confession at this time. I too have fought the battle of the bulge. I too have given in to the whims of fashion, starving myself and exercising constantly. I was exhausted, and photographs from that time show a rather unhealthy looking young woman. For obvious reasons, the instant I relaxed my Draconian regimen, the weight came back.

Then, about eight years ago, for medical reasons, I had to lose some poundage, so I did. Slowly. It quite literally took years. But here is the crucial difference: my aim was not to be thin. I am still luxuriously plus-sized, with a beautiful décolletage and a comfortably curvaceous figure. I was never meant to be thin, and I have the common sense to realize it.

Oprah, there is nothing wrong with being “fat,” as you define fat. It is so easy to predict your future: months of hard work, following your new program for 2009, success, posing for happy pictures.

And by 2010, the weight will be back. And it will be time for yet another round of annoying interviews with a woman who refuses to accept herself for who she is.

Oprah, no matter how much you achieve, how much money you make, you will never truly love yourself until you learn to love the shape you were born to have.

Hmmmmm...Methinks I should have my own chat show, don’t you?

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Dead Fashion Models: A Modest Suggestion

DAHLINGS -

I was reading in the newspaper over the past weeks that those poor anorexic girls are dropping like flies down in Brazil. Brazil, mind, where they used to CELEBRATE the lushness of the female figure! How has society come to this? One of those hideous Olsen twins was quoted this morning as saying that it was her bad hair dye that made her look too thin. Yes, sweetie, and it was having two faces that made that calf look slightly odd. All in the eye of the beholder, don't you know.

Rather than encouraging girls to waste away and die, we should keep the dead ones, and use them. Why keep asking these poor children to starve themselves to death, when we have plenty of deceased models around?

I am fairly certain most of them come from deprived backgrounds, so the families would be happy to be saved funeral and burial costs.

Here is my plan, which is not only practical but could save dozens of young lives in the future:
1) Take one dead young female fashion model;
2) Freeze-dry her, the way people freeze-dry their dead pets, preferably in an attitude of disdain and one arm bent;
3) Lacquer the body, because it might smell under hot lights;
4) Make a runway with a sort of rolling thing, you know, like those sushi restaurants where you grab the little trays off of the rotating circle thing;

And voila!

An entire fashion show of unliving fashion models, just the way the designers want them. Gaunt, bereft of female flesh, and of course, expressionless. If the designer wants the illusion of living, he can paint the faces in gaudy colors and use a wind machine.

Or--

Fashion designers and the fashion industry in general could promote a healthy ideal of female beauty, one that celebrates fleshiness, the slight rounding of the female stomach, a plump elbow, perhaps even the unthinkable...breasts, hips, and thighs. Girls who look like young WOMEN, not starvation victims. Girls who feel GOOD about their bodies, no matter what the shape, no matter what the size, because wherever they look they can find a role model.

I admit, I do not see it happening in my lifetime. But it is something to dream about...

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Ana Carolina Reston, R.I.P.

21- year-old Ana Carolina Reston, who had worked in China, Turkey, Mexico and Japan for several modeling agencies, died Tuesday, according to Sao Paulo's Servidor Publico Hospital. The hospital said the infection that killed the 5-foot-8-inch model was caused by anorexia nervosa, a disorder characterized by an abnormal fear of becoming obese, an aversion to food and severe weight loss. She weighed 88 pounds. (Reuters)

Dahlings -

I know that I have railed in these pages against thin models, decrying the prevalent mode of stick-figuredom that is the standard of contemporary fashion. I myself am anything but thin, for which I am profoundly grateful. Dying for Fashion is intolerably sad, and I will use this bully pulpit to say:

Shame on the fashion industry for promoting this horrendous ideal

Shame on the entertainment industry for encouraging actresses to do likewise

Shame on those who believe that womanly curves constitute obesity, or that anything short of this unrealistic, deadly ideal is bad, ugly, worth starving yourself and cutting off parts of yourself for.

Bravo for those women who stand up to this and say NO. A short honor roll:

• Rosie O'Donnell



• Mo'nique



• Camryn Mannheim



• Every Marilyn Monroe impersonator, because you have to be voluptuous to be believable



• Delta Burke



• Queen Latifah

And let me leave you with these two images, one of the late Ana Carolina Reston and one of the fashion model known as Velvet. Rest in peace, Ana.

Ciao,

Elisa

IT'S OFFICIAL: 'FAT IS THE NEW BLACK!'

DAHLINGS -

That wonderful Isaac Mizrahi just pronounced that "Fat Is The New Black." On national radio, no less!

I have been promoting this idea fashion-wise ever since I was a buxom young lass. At last, society has caught up with moi.

Fashion Week has been quite, quite the experience, as I might have written before. One designer's show could have been titled "Attack of the Skinny Teen-Agers," as a parade of bulemic heroin addicts in 5 inch heels stumbled down the runway in evening gowns meant for women twice their age and size, with that glazed look one associates with continual hunger and drug abuse. There were a number of paramedics outside the white tents at New York's Bryant Park (yes, I know it's near the Fashion District, but it's so...midtown). They dashed into the backstage areas periodically, signalled by frantic designers, to administer emergency doses of protein powder and methadone.

All for now. I shall celebrate Mr. Mizhari's pronouncement with a banana split (Kahlua makes an excellent substitute for hot fudge, dahlings). It almost makes me forgive him for Target.

Ciao,
Elisa and Bucky the Wonderdog