2010 SAG Awards: The Worst Dressed

DAHLINGS -

First, my absolute top of the list:



The entire female cast of Nine! Together, they look like a fabric catfight. Separately isn't so good, either. For instance, zombie Nicole Kidman:



At a distance it looks like an ugly peasant dress, but upon closer examination, it is an ugly peasant dress covered with sequins. Hair collides with Bob Mackie. And Kate Hudson...why this obsession with white?



From the front, she looks like a large bar of white chocolate. Simultaneously, she looks as though she never touches white chocolate, or anything remotely calorific. This dress gives me a severe case of cognitive dissonance. (Look it up.)

Speaking of Kate Hudson, one suspects Paula Patton stole Hudson's dress from the Golden Globes (I hope Ms. Patton got the blood off the dress from the man's severed hand, cf. an earlier entry):



Ordinarily I applaud women who display their curves. I fervently hope that Patricia Arquette's gown is vintage 1970s, otherwise...well...although who in their right mind would wear vintage 1970s?



Anna Paquin's dress would have made my "Breast Foot Forward" list if I had one this go-round. But I do not, so I'll simply say it looks like a leftover from Snakes On A Plane. (Note tasteful placement of cobra head.)



Heidi Klum* would undoubtedly say that Mariska Hargitay's dress seems to be "pooping fabric," to use one of Ms. Klum's favorite terms. Combine that with the unflattering hot pink, and you get this:



Sandra Bullock channels Jean-Luc Picard from Star Trek in this, er, rather strange selection. When she recieved her award, Ms. Bullock nobly tried to move her face, but to no avail.



Dianna Agron did not want to carry a clutch. So she kept a lipstick and some low-cal snacks in a handy pouch hanging off her cleavage:



Finally, I had not thought that Toni Collette could top that mass of sequins she wore to the Golden Globes, but voila! Words fail me (just imagine some gargling noises, dear readers).



* My apologies for not writing about Project Runway yet. Busy, busy!

As always, feel free to leave your comments. But bear in mind, I am always right.

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Jennifer Hudson Is Not Even 'Chunky' - Plus Today's Fashion Tip!

DAHLINGS,

I have meant, over and over again, to return to this little forum to opine about the important subjects of today, such as: who thinks the bubble skirt actually looks good? And aren't we all delighted that Jennifer Hudson stole the show in "Dreamgirls"? Of course, she is Hollywood's version of overweight, which means she is slightly underweight rather than seriously gaunt. I saw the original woman, something Holliday (do you think I have TIME to look it up?) who was large and amazingly talented.

But, it would seem the genitalia of most the males who run Hollywood shrink up when they see a powerful large woman. (The poor dears really do need therapy to get over their mothers.)

Ergo, the "semi-fat" sidekick, who isn't fat but slightly more rounded than the hollow-cheeked heroine. Such as Jennifer Coolidge. Why are all these women named Jennifer, anyway? And in that "Shoes" movie about sisters, the obese, slovely one is played by Toni Collette--Toni Collette!--whose one concession to reality is to have her bras a bit too tight in the back. At least she isn't named Jennifer.

All for now -- but I wanted to let you know that I have a singular selection of dazzling holiday fashions and jewelry, to wit:

"Dreamgirls" era 60s pink lace dress, XL:

Vintage Weiss green rhinestone necklace, signed:

Vintage 80s Joan Collins crystal pleated shoulder and bust emerald green, XXL

NWOT Niki Livas blue-green organza formal cocktail dress, size 16W:


And much more to come.

Ciao,
Elisa and Bucky The Wonderdog

Today's Fashion Tip:
Prescription For Dressing: BREAKFAST
It's good psychology to start the day with bright colors, so choose something gay in a washable fabric. Breakfast coat, brunch coat, house dress, smock, skirt and shirt or slacks and shirt; + apron if you're cooking; + casual shoes, sandals or flats.
Edith Head, "The Dress Doctor"