Derek Lam Prostitutes Himself For Ebay

DAHLINGS -

Ebay has been desperately searching for a way to salvage its diminished reputation. From being known as "America's flea market" to "America's junk dump" has taken years of hard work. To earn a reputation as bad as Ebay's is now, requires devotion.

Devotion to letting Chinese sellers rip off Ebay customers with fake designer merchandise. Devotion to shutting down the small sellers that made Ebay so popular when it began. Devotion to progressly stripping sellers of their rights, including the inability to realistically be rated by buyers, unable to leave feedback about bad buyers, unable to respond to unrealistic expectations by buyers. Unless it's Express Mail, no package can be counted on to be reliably delivered within two days of payment.

Devotion to further undermining the smaller sellers by running ads by large companies for similar merchandise on the same pages as the listings. By making the search engine virtually impossible to use. By giving preferential treatment to sellers who list in the thousands rather than the dozens.

Devotion to letting Paypal, its subsidiary, arbitrarily withhold the sellers' money under a series of rules that grow increasing more Byzantine by the year. Which included banning cash and money orders and setting up as competition payment systems that both cost more and were harder to use.

Despite a phony claim to being "just a venue," Ebay treated the sellers, its CUSTOMERS, as if they had no right to be there. Ebay started as a democracy and gradually became a dictatorship, first under the leadership of the vicious Meg Whitman, and later under the unconscionable rule of John Donahoe.

As an Ebay seller from 2002 until 2010, I am in a position to know all too well what I am writing about. A major problem is that no venue has been able to compete for Ebay's visibility in the larger marketplace. For years sellers have hoped that Google would set up a competing site. But that apparently is not in the cards.

And now, major designers are selling their collections on Ebay. This is a foul thing to do. Derek Lam is merely the latest designer to spread his legs for Ebay.

His collection will be "voted on" in the same way that American Idol votes on its contestants. Previous prostitutes for Ebay have been Norma Kamali and Narciso Rodriguez.

http://nymag.com/daily/fashion/2010/10/derek_lam_is_launching_a_colle.html

If you want to bring "affordable fashion" to Americans, sell your collections at Target, which has the honesty to call itself a commercial retailer.

Shame on you, Ebay, for helping to further destroy what was once a viable source of income for so many ordinary Americans. All the while baying that you believe that "people are essentially good."

People, perhaps, but certainly not your management.

Ebay is a disgrace to the values you pretend to promote, and you are a disgrace to America.

Ciao,

Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Michael Caine Sums Up My Feelings About Ebay

DAHLINGS:

I have been in a slough of despond (look it up) since closing down my Ebay store. I still have two large bins of handbags to be disposed of somehow, and numerous odds and ends. At the moment, this clip from the movie "Little Voice," starring Jane Horrocks and Michael Caine, speaks to my soul.

For those of you who have never seen the film, Michael Caine is a small-time promoter who discovers a girl who can sing like anybody, including Judy Garland and Shirley Bassey. But on the night of her big premiere, which has cost him all of his money, everything goes wrong. This is his response. Watch for Ewan MacGregor as the other male lead, and Brenda Blethyn.



There are many future endeavors beckoning to moi, including Full Figured Fashion Week in July! I shall be posting again soon, once the librium kicks in.

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

A Farewell To Ebay

DAHLINGS -

It is with a heavy heart that I inform you that I have closed my Ebay store. I still have some listings up, but not for long.

Being an online seller on Ebay has long been an Orwellian nightware: higher fees are better for sellers; not being able to leave feedback for bad buyers is good for business and keeps the marketplace safe; and its most recent move, changing store listings into 30-day listings that cost 400% more and have to be re-upped every month. "Griff", the friendly, soulless face of Ebay, relentlessly ducks questions as he shills for the company.

Meanwhile, Ebay's reputation has plummeted. How many times have I been told that Ebay sellers are dishonest? Thieves? Misrepresenters of their product?

Other sellers have told me to move to Etsy.com or Bonanzle.com. I have nothing against these fine sites, but it is time for me to move on to other pursuits. I have a book to write, personal appearances to make, and as always, this blog-thing.

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Jesus, a Cheese Sandwich and Moi

DAHLINGS –

I don’t know if it’s Christmas approaching. Maybe not, because it's not the first time this has happened.

All that I can tell you is, mes lecteurs bien-aimés, that I returned home the other night to hear my maid in the kitchen speaking in tongues.

This is not the usual sound that comes from the kitchen…the usual sounds are dishes breaking and cursing in a foreign language. Bucky was barking wildly. Yours truly had a fairly good idea of who was here.

So your faithful correspondent entered the kitchen, which, to be honest, is relatively unfamiliar territory to moi. And there I found Jesus making himself a cheese sandwich.

Bucky was in the corner, barking, the hair on his back up. Not a good sign. The last thing I needed was for my dog to sink his teeth into Christ's ankle.

Ever since I said something nasty about people who thought Jesus Christ was on a grilled cheese sandwich that sold on (ugh) Ebay, Jesus started coming around every now and again, helping himself to my larder. And it's almost inevitably aged diary products.

I drew myself up to my full height (Jesus is several inches shorter than I) and said, “What are you doing here, Jesus?”

“I was hungry,” he replied. It was a little hard to hear him with my maid on the floor ululating, so I pushed her out of the kitchen into the butler’s pantry and shut the door. I also shooed Bucky out of the kitchen. He growled but trotted away down the hall.

Of all the gall, showing up in my kitchen. Freeloaders, even if they are deities, work my last nerve, as the young people say. “You always have several kinds of cheese,” he added. "Tonight it's sharp cheddar." The toast popped out of the Dualit Combi toaster, and Jesus dropped it onto a Ming Dynasty plate.

“Do you have any Branston pickle?”

“No.” I sighed in annoyance. I folded my arms. “I have asked you not to barge in here any time you feel like it, Jesus.”

He turned and glared at me. Really, that crown of thorns was most unbecoming. At least this time he was wearing robes instead of only a loincloth. Not that he doesn't have a nice body, but it is inappropriate anywhere but a swimming pool, in your faithful correspondent's opinion.




“That’s MISTER Jesus to you,” he snapped. “Besides, didn’t I imprint my face on food for you to sell on Ebay?”

“It was scrambled eggs,” I retorted. “You know they don’t hold together.”


Jesus started rummaging through the cabinets above the stove. “You’re out of Marmite.”


“Why don’t you conjure some from an old packet of yeast, Mister Jesus?”

The maid was still speaking in tongues in the butler’s pantry. It is extremely irritating to listen to, but what can one expect when an uneducated woman encounters Christ in the kitchen? I’ve lost several maids that way.

At least he had made me some lovely built-ins for my office. He's quite a talented carpenter.

“I don’t believe in God, Mister Holy Trinity, but if I did, I would DEFINITELY send in a complaint. I mean, who died and made you Savior?”

"Our heavenly father, you heathen."

"Maybe he's your father, but he certainly isn't mine. I have a hard enough time coping with your existence--and there are many millions of Muslims who would agree with me. I'm not so sure about the Jews. I'll have to ask Michael Kors."

"I'm not getting into this argument with you again," he said. "Watch it, or I’ll start playing with the space/time continuum. You’ll find yourself pretending to be eleven years old again.”

“Don’t bring my mother into this!” (cf. earlier entries)

“Thanks for the sandwich,” he said sarcastically, and disappeared.

After a few minutes,I yelled for my assistant to come and quiet the maid.

Thank goodness Jesus had left the building.

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Ebay Needs A Stimulus Package! Cue Michael Jackson...

DAHLINGS -

Sellers have been crying out and gnashing their teeth at the steady exodus of buyers from (ugh) Ebay. Which also seems to have something to do with the steady increase of large companies (Buy.com, etc.) being allowed to list on Ebay for free and showcase their wares at the top of smaller seller's listings. I myself have certainly considered moving on. Although having one's own e-commerce website is such a bore.

There is a thread on the Vintage Clothing discussion board on (ugh) Ebay that has been quite fascinating to read. Sellers have been venting their frustrations in song parodies, everything from "Mandy" to "My Boyfriend's Back."

In honor of Michael Jackson's recent passing, I thought I would publish (with the seller's permission) this rewrite of the timeless, currently inescapable classic, "Thriller."

It’s close to midnight I’m sitting staring at my monitor
The Ebay summary Is showing that no bidding has occurred
I want to scream but nobody can hear my tearful wails
It’s a bad dream, it’s been two weeks since I’ve had any sales
But that entails

Having bidders
Bidders buy
Just push that stupid button it’s a thing that you don’t dare try
Come on you bidders
Bidders buy
I’m fighting for my life because those bidders, bidders don’t buy!

You hear the door slam, your husband’s gone to bed and he is pissed
Because the room's crammed with crap he wishes never did exist
Now is the time for watchers to get off their lazy asses
But as the time clicks by you know the listings will just end
Cause you depend

On having bidders (woo-hoo)
Bidders buy
Just open Paypal up but it’s a thing that you don’t dare try
I’m begging bidders, bidders buy
So I’ll go down the tubes because those bidders, bidders won’t buy!



Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Snow In New York City On The First Day of Spring!

DAHLINGS -

This is nothing less than an outrage! I awoke this morning, parted the curtains of my bedroom, to be confronted by a BLIZZARD!

Isn't this supposed to be Spring? I feel personally offended, mon cher lecteurs, because I have been planning to break out my open-toed shoes, my peep-toe pumps, and my slingbacks. Yes, I have a car and driver so I don't exactly have to walk that far anywhere, but there is still the risk of stepping into a puddle and ruining my custom-made footwear! (As I have mentioned, I have the misfortune of having size 11ww feet...it goes with being extremely tall.)

Speaking of large feet, you can find these beautiful lilac Thai silk pumps in my (ugh) Ebay store, in size 13M:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&ssPageName=STRK:MESELX:IT&item=230181858687

And like many of the items in my store, they are 15% off! Have a browse around and take advantage of the savings.

In the meantime, I must rethink my footwear plans. Damn Mother Nature!

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Black Friday & The Vintage Blow Out Sale On Ebay

DAHLINGS -

It's Black Friday, and this week the vintage sellers on (ugh) Ebay are having a Vintage Blow Out Sale. Everything--clothes, jewels, accessories--is on sale for $19.99 or less, mostly less.



I myself have listed some things in my little shop. Do go have a look, won't you? Remember, it's cheaper and safer to shop online!

For example, this fascinating estate ceramic earring and brooch set, probably Japanese in origin:



Or this pretty sheer printed rayon 1940s dress with a gathered skirt and large pockets:



Happy shopping! Just type "VBO" into the search subject line and use "ending soonest" in the drop-down menu instead of the diabolical "Best Match". You'll be up to your eyes in bargains before you know it.

And if you are looking for a truly MASSIVE bargain, I'm selling over 100 pieces of men's and women's vintage clothing and accessories for less than $4.00 a piece. Hard to believe, I know, but there are Oscar de la Rentas, mint condition thigh-high stockings, and men's suits by Hart, Schaffner & Marx in these lovely brand new cardboard boxes:


http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&rd=1&item=390012275554

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky The Wonderdog

Soon To Be Listed In The Bodacious House of Style!

DAHLINGS -

As you well know, (ugh) Ebay is not my favorite place on the planet, however, one must make oneself available to as much of the vast, panting public as humanly possible. So here for your delectation is some of the truly dazzling jewelry I shall be listing in the coming week. Some of it is already listed!

Vintage 1950s cats-eye glasses brooch with genuine rhinestones on the ends:



Vintage 1950 high-end rhinestone necklace and large earring set, still in the original box:



Vintage 1960s hippie bohemian "evil eye" bead necklace:



Vintage faux amber necklace:



So do take a look, dahlings!

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky The Wonderdog

Ebay's Last Supper...

DAHLINGS -

On the discussion boards of (ugh) Ebay, there has been much lively chatter. One seller asked if Ebay was the antichrist, positing that these are "the end of days." Another seller provided the following illustration, which I had to share with you. (Please note this is NOT my creation!)



There are quite a few others, but they might be a bit too "in" for reproduction here.

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Ebay: Auctioning Off Its Soul

Dahlings –

Before I was able to write more about Project Runway, I felt the need to address the massive changes announced by (ugh) Ebay last week. It is not just that I am outraged. Every August, like clockwork, Ebay comes up with new outrages and higher fees, but these truly take the creme brulee.

Instead of ranting, after careful consideration I decided to take a quieter approach. Comments are welcomed.

Many of these changes have been reported by the national news media, but with quite a few pertinent matters left out or soft-pedaled. Numerous articles focus on Ebay’s de-emphasizing of auctions in the coming months. Part of the problem is that none of these writers have sold on Ebay (something they have in common with Ebay’s staff). But here are a few tid-bits you might like to know.

All sellers pay to sell on Ebay. It is shocking how much of the general public does not know that. From the seller with two key chains to the seller with a store stocked with 300 pieces of baby clothing, they all pay to sell. A seller’s monthly fees can range between $46 to $5K.

Unless you are Buy.com, in which case, you do not have to pay anything. Not a sou. But, Buy.com’s listings appear on every page, right under the highly manipulated Search Results.

If you have a store, there is a monthly fee. Even though your store items will not come up in Search Results. They discontinued that practice some time ago. When you list an item for sale, there is a fee (or fees, depending on if you use any of the features that Ebay offers, such as scheduling when your listing begins, or putting a Buy It Now price or Reserve on your auction. You will not get those latter two fees back if you cancel them, by the way).

If you sell your item, you first pay Ebay a Final Value Fee, and if the buyer pays by Paypal, you pay Paypal not only the Final Value Fee on the cost of the item itself, but also on the total, including shipping. (Note that I am not including supplies, staff, or anything that is not germane to this discussion.) So Paypal, which is a subsidiary of Ebay, takes its nibble from your shipping cost as well.

With a disingenuousness that not even a serial killer talking his way into your house could match, Lorrie Norrington made a happy announcement of all the wonderful changes that would make our lives so much easier and their profits so much higher:

Lower Fixed Item listing fees…however, they neglected to mention until much later in the announcement that there would be up a 300% increase in Ebay Final Value Fees, thereby wiping out any possible profit.

Electronic Checkout Only…by who else, our old friend Paypal. Oh, and a company with a very close relationship with Paypal via West Fargo, Propay. American currencies such as checks or money orders are no longer considered “safe.” For the sellers who have not accepted Paypal until now, or the hundreds of sellers who get a considerable portion of their income from paper currency, this is more than a substantial blow. Not to mention a blow to those buyers who, for whatever reasons, do not have credit cards. One imagines Debtors Anonymous will be encouraging its members to leave Ebay en masse. Antitrust complaints to state and local Attorney General’s offices are apparently pouring in.

Fixed Shipping Costs. Sellers can now be penalized (even lose their stores) if buyers feel their shipping costs are too high. This, even if the seller is only charging the ACTUAL cost of shipping. From the Ebay new Shipping Limits FAQ:

Q: Why are you setting limits on shipping charges lower than my actual costs to ship?

A: We based our maximum shipping & handling charges on recent transaction data of what sellers are charging and what buyers have told us is reasonable. We know that what buyers consider to be reasonable will be less than sellers' actual costs in some cases. We believe that by offering buyers at least one shipping option that they deem reasonable, sellers will increase their overall sales and conversion.

Pardonnez moi. I had to leave the room and shriek a few times.

Buyers are told that leaving four star ratings are “good,” but sellers are told that anything under four and a half stars could risk the seller losing everything; their store, their account, everything. Your faithful correspondent cannot even begin to quote the answers that "Griff," the avuncular lapdog for Ebay, gives to the question: "how can four stars be both good and bad at the same time?" Suffice to say I needed a stiff drink after reading it, and it still didn't make any sense.

By "lapdog," of course, I mean no disrespect to my beloved miniature pinscher, Bucky. That little darling would make short work of Ebay CEO John Donahoe's ankles. In my own listings I do my best to explain this little bit of corporate doublespeak to my potential buyers.

Ebay operates as a great sucking void into which sellers throw their money. Somehow, the fact that Ebay sellers are actually CUSTOMERS of Ebay got lost somewhere around 2005. Ebay loves to talk about “improving the buyer experience.” But when they try to say anything about “improving the seller experience,” the sheer magnitude of their lies renders them incapable of making anything other than gurgling noises.

Discontented sellers are told to move elsewhere, and many are. Some moan and complain that those other sites don't have the Web presence of the Evil Empire. However, one must remember that it took Ebay fourteen years to become Ebay.

But at this rate, it will take less than a year for Ebay to become Edsel.

Ciao,

Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Stop The Presses! Is Ebay.Au Going To Court?

DAHLINGS -

I was sent this media statement this morning. I was so startled I dropped my cappucino. One believes it originates from Ebay Australia, although I will check to make certain I am not passing along misinformation. This could set a precedent, dahlings, so do try to plow through it!

Media Statement – 5.00pm 13th July, 2008

Ebay Members to Seek Recourse Through the Courts

Early last week a well co-ordinated group of ebay members was instrumental in facilitating large numbers of their peers, nationally, to write to their local Ministers, Senators, The Banking Ombudsman and to ASIC and other relevant organisations to register complaints over the aggressive manner in which ebay continues to promote PayPal as its preferred payment method.

The complaints are well documented and numerous, and ranged from : ebay’s misrepresentation, suppression of other payment methods, deletion of sellers’ listings without cause, refusal to allow sellers to pass on PayPal charges and the issuing of misleading statements to further the illusion that PayPal is more secure than other established and proven payment methods.

Other complaints included PayPal’s freezing of member’s accounts, the inequity of the PayPal User Agreement and PayPal’s refusal to sign the EFT Code of Conduct - therein denying ebay members the same protection which banks and other financial institutions provide to their customers. Later in the week the group again led their peers to write en-masse, but on this occasion to their respective banks, to air concerns over ebay’s public statements that PayPal is the safest product in the EFT marketplace, implying that all other EFT transactions – and in particular Direct Deposit – are unsafe by comparison. On the basis that the ACCC concluded in its draft Notice : "The evidence available does not support the view that PayPal is the most secure method of payment or offers the best service for all transactions", ebay members sought reassurance from their banks that ebay’s assertions are incorrect and that Direct Deposit is a safe transaction method. This week the group will launch a further series of initiatives.

Mr Tony Green, the group’s spokesman on legal matters, announced today that “… as ebay’s response to member’s legitimate concerns is woefully inadequate it is now time to commence our next offensive which will be to seek remedies through the courts”. Mr Green went on to say ”Ebay’s recalcitrant behaviour has pushed us to the point that we must now use the legal system to bring ebay into line with decent trading practices.”Mr Green said, “In a conference last night the group decided unanimously that it would use legal due process to stop ebay from destroying its own site and, in the process of this, destroying the livelihoods of hundreds of thousands of loyal ebay members”. He added, “We are ebay’s customers and to date they have refused to listen to us. Ebay has left us no alternative than to appeal to the courts to right the wrongs that ebay has forced upon us.”In anticipation of this offensive the group has had a team of researchers looking at legal precedents, similar legal actions and the various legal alternatives available to it.“We discussed several options available to us in prosecuting these actions,” said Mr Green “… and the possibility of a major legal firm doing the work on a no win no fee contingency basis is being examined.”

“The principles at issue here are of vital importance to the largest consumer group in Australia – 5 million people according to ebay’s own figures – only a few of these are commercially scaled businesses, most are mums and dads striving for a modest supplement to the household income, and these people do not have the financial resources to pursue fair and just treatment at the hands of ebay”, said Mr Green. “It appears that political leaders and regulators have yet to fully comprehend the significance of the issues and have not yet commenced the required corrective actions, and thus the group has stepped up its activity to rally ebay members together and to take ebay on as one. Ultimately, ebay will be made to comply with all of the laws of our country.”

Contact has been made with a University Law School as the group are exploring the possibility of engaging law students – ironically, many of them also disaffected ebay members – to research this area and begin cataloguing the huge volume of accumulated evidence assembled by ebay members. Further, there are a growing number of other ebay members offering to contribute to a fighting fund to pay for the planned actions.

“Ebay members are delighted to learn of Paymate Pty Ltd’s announcement on 11th July of it having lodged a formal complaint to the ACCC concerning ebay’s alleged breaches of s47 and s52 of the Trade Practices Act 1974,” said Mr Green, ” … and our group will now examine the merits of approaching Paymate with a view to the pooling of evidence and conducting a joint legal offensive against ebay.” “Our research to date is moving us on from the Trade Practices, and other Acts, competition sections to those sections dealing with unconscionable conduct, and breach of contract “, said Mr Green.“We need to do something dramatic, and quickly, to protect ebay members – mums, dads and businesses – from being destroyed by a company that can see no further than its own profit figure. If the anger of its loyal customers means nothing to ebay we intend to look to the courts to uphold Australian Law and to give us respite from the excesses of ebay”, said Mr Green.“Ebay believes that ebay members are isolated from each other, largely ignorant of ebay’s actions with regard to PayPal and are therefore ineffectual in complaining about or opposing ebay’s deplorable practices. For the average ebayer being channelled into paying by PayPal may seem to be a risk free and temporary thing rather than a calculated deception by ebay”, Mr Green said. ”Most ebayers are unsure how and where they should complain, and ebay are counting on this to push its policies through. We intend to expose this tactic to all ebay members.”

“The discussion boards on ebay are a good indicator of the level of anger at ebay’s new policies. There is no flocking to the boards by people who support the new policies. To the contrary they are full of horror stories and tales of anger and frustration from people who are violently opposed to them”, said Mr Green.“Between them the co-ordinators of the group have a data base of over one hundred thousand email addresses of ebay members who have purchased from us, and through other supporting sellers access to many hundreds of thousands more. If necessary we will contact every one of them to alert them to the full consequences of the disastrous policies that ebay have introduced. We will do the job that ebay is morally obliged but too frightened to do – to keep ebay members informed,” said Mr Green.

The group will conference again this evening to make decisions on its first legal offensive against ebay and to decide on a timetable.

Meanwhile, activity on the ebay site from both buyers and sellers has taken a nosedive, member’s anger and frustration continues unabated, and the level of disaffection with ebay is growing. Ebay’s only response has been to temporarily discount listing fees – again – the third such promotion in the past six weeks in a desperate move by ebay to arrest the steady decline in the number of listings.

----- Statement Ends ------
Media Enquiries : Mr Robert Vandermeer

Well, well, well.

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Diamonds Are A Woman's Best Friend!

DAHLINGS -

I simply had to rephrase that famous line, because as Rita Hayworth put it, "I've never thought of myself as a girl."

However, 'tis true, there is nothing like the sparkle and shimmer of real diamonds, although fine quality rhinestones come awfully close.

This is written because I have up for auction on (ugh) Ebay a beautiful antique diamond ring, with seven European-cut diamonds channel set in 14k white gold. And it's a size 9, which is quite large! Recently I have come into the possession of quite a bit of fine jewelry, which I am selling on both of my sites (one must spread the wealth, you know.)

This is the ring, done in the "bow" style, I believe it is called:




http://tinyurl.com/6j5u62

Over at The Mad Fashionista's Vintage & Modern on Specialist Auctions, I don't have any diamonds just now, but there are two necklaces made to be worn over a spray-on tan. First is a gorgeous platinum over sterling silver chain necklace, with a genuine amethyst pendant, accented with 14k gold!


http://www.specialistauctions.com/auctiondetails.php?id=722074

And, listed at an INSANELY reasonable price, a beautiful vintage 80s choker made of coral, mother of pearl, and gold-filled spacers:


http://www.specialistauctions.com/auctiondetails.php?id=786676

I do hope that you like what you see, because there is more to come!

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky The Wonderdog

Ebay News From All Over...Meg Makes Out

DAHLINGS -

First of all, congratulations to former Ebay CEO Meg Whitman for cashing in her Ebay stock before the new feedback changes were implemented this past Monday. According to my sources, she made a $6 million dollar profit:

http://biz.yahoo.com/ap/080519/ebay_insider_transactions.html?.v=1

This is in direct proportion to the money that will be lost by sellers on Ebay as their feedback numbers and percentages drop. New changes too dreary to go into detail about mean that companies such as Buy.com can list on Ebay in unlimited quantities alongside the smaller sellers. Many Powersellers have seen their 100% feedback badly dented by the new changes. Yours truly must confess that my percentage dropped from 99.6 to 99.3 because of 1 negative received in the last twelve months.

However, yours truly is fighting the good fight. Ending in two days, this exquisite peach crepe 30s/40s "cusper" glamour girl gown, XXL (it is not sheer, the effect is due to the camera flash):



http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=230252651159

And I shall be listing quite a bit of smaller-size vintage wholesale lots on Ebay in the next few days, so keep an eye out!

Sellers will also no longer be allowed to have outside links on their "About Me" pages, including links to their own stores. However, so many sellers are leaving in droves, that change may not mean much in coming months.

Meanwhile, browse at my Specialist Auctions shop, for some lovely vintage jewelry:



And so much more!

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

How Does Ebay Resemble A Suicidal Teenager?

DAHLINGS -

First of all, a disclaimer: there is no disrepect intended towards suicidal teenagers, their families and friends in this blog-thing. One recognizes the pain that such things cause in what is laughingly called "real life." I know--sometimes I watch the news on television.

However, what teenager has not harbored thoughts, however fleeting, of doing themselves in? I am firmly convinced that the new CEO of Ebay, John Donohoe, must have had a simply ghastly childhood and is bent on self-destruction. And he means to take (ugh) Ebay with him.

For instance, this recent article from the ever-authoritative Ina Steiner of AuctionBytes.com:
http://blog.auctionbytes.com/cgi-bin/blog/blog.pl

It details the feedback changes to come next week on Ebay, in which most seller's feedback will plummet due to recalculations. The reason for these changes are only known to those cackling demons that sit in Ebay's boardroom in the fifth circle of Hell.

With each passing week, changes are made that make it increasingly hard to sell on Ebay. For instance, the Ebay-owned company Paypal does not prints First Class International postage, even though it offers it in listings as a shipping option! Sellers are often forced to charge international buyers Priority Mail (yes, I know the dollar is down and every country short of Zambia has more money than the USA, but still...). Do you think it is enjoyable to charge $37 to ship a box of dresses to Australia?

Not only that, there is something called a DSR rating. Trying to figure it out sends me to the divan with a cold cloth on my forehead. However, this obscure, meaningless...thing...will be determining where one turns up in Search on Ebay. Oh, and as the young folk say, do not get me started about Best Match!

I have already written about the imminent change where sellers will no longer be able to leave negative feedback for buyers, but not vice versa. That's something to look forward to, eh? A few bad apples and the whole barrel will rot.

In addition (the list goes on) Ebay is being sued right and left, most recently by Craig's List for fiduciary interference.

If Ebay was a teenager, it would have a fifth of vodka on the front seat and be driving toward an oncoming oak tree. Don't say I didn't warn you. An intervention is needed. Federal Trade Commission, are you listening?

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Specialist Auctions To Go Against Ebay!

DAHLINGS -

This afternoon, the following press release (I shall withhold the contact information) appeared in your faithful correspondent's inbox:

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

SPECIALIST AUCTIONS TO GO HEAD TO HEAD WITH EBAY DURING “VINTAGE BLOW-OUT SALE”

VBOE on Specialist Auctions February 14 – February 21, 2008

In an effort to attract both unhappy Ebay buyers and sellers, the rapidly expanding UK-based site Specialist Auctions (www.specialistauctions.com) announced plans to compete directly with a long-held tradition of Ebay vintage clothing sellers: the popular “Vintage Blow Out Sale.” During this sale, many vintage items are sold for $19.99 or less.

Specialist Auctions is calling its sale “VBOE,” and VBOE is rapidly catching on. Numerous Ebay vintage sellers, some of them Powersellers, are signing up on Specialist Auctions in order to take advantage of the event, which, like VBO, runs from February 14 through February 21, 2008. Many vintage items will be also be offered for $19.99 or less.

On February 4, VBOE was featured on the popular blog site She’s A Betty. (http://shesabetty.typepad.com/shes_a_betty_single_girl). Shortly after that it was given a write-up on the website Antique Trader.

During VBOE, buyers will be able to pick from a huge variety of vintage clothes, hats, accessories, jewelry, and more. Just like on Ebay.

The recent changes at Ebay have prompted calls for a boycott starting February 18 and lasting at least a week. By moving to sites like Specialist Auctions, sellers can sell with a clear conscience—and not be held hostage to payment method Paypal, an Ebay subsidiary that recently announced it could put a 21-day hold on payments, even if the item was shipped to the buyer.

Sellers on Specialist Auctions accept a wide array of payment options, including Google Checkout, Western Union, money orders, and bank transfers. Not only that, the only charge to sellers that Specialist Auctions asks for is 3% of the sale price of an item—no matter how high or how low.

So if you REALLY want to shop victoriously, shop at Specialist Auctions during VBOE!

*****

My, my, will wonders never cease.

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Has Ebay Finally Gone Too Far?

DAHLINGS –

This past week has been simply filled with drama! And not the sham reality show kind, either. Real, gripping, human drama…at least if you happen to sell on (ugh) Ebay.

Let me see if I can explain this in layperson’s language. It is so terribly complicated, even your faithful correspondent cannot understand it all.

You see, first Meg Whitman, head of Ebay, stepped down, and in her place came a gentleman I can assure you knows nothing about buying and selling on the Internet (or anywhere else, for that matter). I name no names; that is for Fortune and CNN to do.

This week, the-powers-that-be introduced “fee reductions” that turned out to be Orwellian fee INCREASES! That is, you would pay less up front to list your item, but suddenly the fee extracted from the sale would rocket upwards. And some of the fees that are refunded upon selling your item are no longer refundable.

But what turned most sellers’s hair white overnight was the announcement of an outrageous, unbelievable change to one of the fundamental principles of Ebay: the feedback system.

If you have ever used Ebay at all (and who at some time hasn’t decided to buy a used Gameboy?) then you know that sellers and buyers are rated by feedback. The more positive feedback, the higher the rating. Following me so far? Good. The more negative feedback, the lower the rating. This was true for both sellers and buyers. As a seller, I can tell you that more than once I have checked a buyer’s feedback and been appalled at what I’ve found…no details, this discussion is cluttered enough.

WELL. Ebay, in its wisdom, decided to REMOVE the right of sellers to leave negative or even neutral feedback for buyers! The thought makes one’s head spin.

Last year yours truly was the victim of buyer fraud. Again, I name no names. The buyer left me a negative. I was able to leave negative feedback that explained my side of the story. What is to happen now? One seller suggested that since we can now only leave positive feedback, perhaps we should say, “I am positive that this buyer sucks.”

Forgive the common language. I am merely quoting.

And to add insult to injury, apparently they will require us to ship our merchandise before it is paid for! This might be the only retail environment on the planet with such a requirement: somehow I do not envision Saks Fifth Avenue being so broadminded should you try to leave with a sable coat. They can hold the money in your Paypal account for up to 21 days if you do not meet their incredibly complicated requirements (why do I suspect it accrues interest for Paypal while it does so?). There are other changes, but I am too dispirited to list them, and this entry is already far too long.

I am in despair, dear readers. Not even a stiff shot of Kahlua in my evening espresso would cheer me up. What is one to do? What is one to do?

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky The Wonderdog

Ain't Nobody Here But Us Chickens...?

DAHLINGS -

Just when one thinks selling on (ugh) Ebay cannot get any stranger...it does.

For example, I am attempting to winnow my inventory for the New Year. So, I have been selling selected merchandise in lots (that is, for the unintiated, in groups. So they do not feel lonely, don't you know).

One recent lot was four vintage 60s fur hats, two mink, one yarn and marabou, and the fourth one probably lynx. Up it went with my other lots, and like any good auction, immediately had bids.

Until one day--poof. It was gone. It had been pulled.

But here is the cherry on the lollipop:

When I clicked on the reason, it took me to a page about being against Ebay policy to sell live animals.

When an auction is pulled, it disappears, along with the names of your bidders, and the description.

I sat at my desk, baffled.

How, I wondered, had I slipped a live animal into my auction? Had I offered Bucky for sale by accident? Had someone slipped a drug into my coffee while I was listing? Was it simple fatigue? Had I offered vintage minks instead of vintage mink hats?

(There's a disturbing image...ancient, angry minks clutching some poor buyer's head.)

One possible reason it was reported was that one of the hats is made of lynx and cashmere (lower right), and there was the vaguest possibility that it was Canadian lynx. It is the same amount of possibility that Santa Claus really exists, but still, one never knows.

So, after a bit of fuming I did the sensible thing and relisted the auction. On Specialist Auctions, where they treat sellers very nicely.

SOLD!

Please do have a look, and if you feel so inclined, have a haggle, as they say.

This time I made certain that the listing contained the word "hats." In the meantime, rest assured that nothing I have up on Ebay has fur on it, and Bucky the Wonderdog is definitely NOT for sale!

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky The Wonderdog

Fall In New York, and A New Venue!

DAHLINGS –

Fall is here in New York at last! We have been sweltering in the unseasonable heat. But yesterday was cool, crisp, and sunny. A perfect time to attend the Tribute To New York celebration at P.J. Clarkes down in Battery Park. I’m still not positive what the whole thing was about, something to do with Italy and design.

We had to wear rosettes made of bright red ribbons with white circles that said “Tribute to New York” in the center. Fortunately your ever-chic correspondent was wearing a black Armani suit with a red silk blouse and a red Coach bag, so it matched. But the rosettes made us resemble members of an over aged high school glee club.

Other fabulously rich citizens munched on mini-hamburgers and risotto, which looked exactly like creamed corn. (Of course, the women would not touch the risotto and threw away the mini-hamburger buns, making them look even more carnivorous than they already did. Which is saying something.) And there was a great deal of cheap champagne being swilled down, naturellement, but not by moi.

My escort and I then strolled down to Culturefest, which should have been called White Tents With Brochures Fest. We “took a powder” as my dear dead friend Lana Turner would say, and went uptown for a decent meal.

The latest news on my end is that I have opened another venue! It is an elegant boutique for the finer things that I would not bother to sell on (ugh) Ebay.

Have no fear, my Ebay shop, Elisa’s Bodacious House of Style, is still my flagship store. But do take a look around Bodaciously Yours Vintage, at Specialist Auctions. It is not geared so exclusively to the full-figured female. Because, alas, as I have lamented in this blog-thing, there was no one in the 1930s sewing plus-sized Chanel knock-offs.

However, you will find such beauties as this Near Mint Vintage 1930s heavy cotton brocade gown in blue and white, with white silk satin collar and cuffs, size Medium:



And this ultra-Mod Vintage 60s Asian golden silk brocade jacket and dress set, with heavy gold soutache embroidery and large gold frog closures on the jacket. Tres Emma Peel in ‘The Avengers’, n’cest pas?

SOLD!

There is also fine jewelry and more. The link is to your right. Specialist Auctions is based in the United Kingdom, and they are ever so delightful to deal with. In fact, my friend Viviene of Born Too Late Vintage (recently profiled here) sells there, so take a look at her store as well!

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Ebay In Person...Or Was It?

DAHLINGS –

My deepest apologies, once again, for letting life get in the way of this blog-thing. As you know, in my last entry, I was reflecting upon Karma after my (ugh) Ebay account was hacked. And then I received the invitation to Ebay In Person. It was in the last week of September.

It was at a tres’ luxurious hotel on the East Side in midtown Manhattan. As we walked in we were handed little notebooks with Ebay on the front and pens that said Ebay. Inside the large conference room was a large buffet, set with food and drink that my seller’s fees were paying for. Of course I wore a stunning 50s blue and black brocade dress and carried Bucky with me. The various Ebay personnel wore name badges and fixed smiles as they greeted us. I nodded politely, ate some expensive hors-deouvres, and mingled as best I could. It seemed that most of the attendees were buyers, and a few part-time sellers. Waiters bearing more expensive nibbles circulated among the crowd. I speared some sweet and sour chicken for Bucky, and a small beef burrito for myself.

An avuncular bearded type who called himself Griff was the subject of much adulation—apparently he has a radio show on Ebay. He bore a remarkable resemblance to that fellow who used to do the oatmeal commercials, what was his name—Wilfred something-or-other. Apparently he wanted us to call him “Uncle Griff.” I suppressed a sneer. I’ve never understood the need that some people have to be thought of as Uncle This or Grandma That…don’t they have their own relatives to annoy?

After what seemed an endless cocktail party without cocktails, we were all seated at round tables for the Question and Answer session with the various Ebay staff members. Their clothes—black shirts with “Ebay” on them and pants—made both the men and women look oddly like male Mormons.

“Uncle Griff” was in charge of the Q&A, running through the crowd to hand off the microphone to various audience members. “Spotters” around the room selected who would ask a question. I managed to give the spotter near me a seductive look and indicated that I wanted to ask a question. When other audience members posed their questions, the only description that applies is that they were given word for word the same canned answers that we received in emails, but now earnestly delivered in person.

(It crossed my mind that Ebay might actually be a cult..)

When it was my turn, I stood up holding Bucky, which really got the cameras going. I smiled as if unsalted butter wouldn’t melt in my mouth, praised Paypal’s Resolution Center, thanked them for moving Reproductions in Vintage, and then asked:

“Earlier this week hundreds of Ebay accounts were hacked. Their names, IDs, and credit card info were on the Trust and Safety Board. When I went to look, the board had been taken down. My ID, which I treasure, which is integral to my good name, had been hacked. When I called the credit card company, they said the initial charges were coming through Ebay. What do you intend to do about this, may one ask?"

The gentleman in charge of Trust and Safety looked gravely at me. He replied that most of their action was being taken on the security side on prevention, that it was hard to keep ahead of the scammers. However, “we’re leading the industry in that area.” Oh? As far as one could discern, the only institution that had fewer leaks than Ebay was the government.

The endless Q&A went on. Some of the answers seemed to be outright lies, if only from anecdotal experience, and the rest was personably impersonal. I lost interest, and took Bucky and self for a short stroll. When I returned, it was almost over.

I sat back down in my chair, we applauded dutifully, and the Ebay employees stepped off the podium. The gentleman in charge of Trust And Safety pulled up a chair next to me.

In a voice that suggested that he was speaking to a small, idiotic child, he asked me to describe the whole experience in great detail. So I did. The gentleman took notes.

He gave me an enormous smile and said, “Elisa, there are people out there who want to make Ebay look bad. This didn’t come from Ebay.”

I did not correct his familiarity in using my first name, but retorted: “The charges came from Ebay. That’s what the credit card company told me.”

“No, they didn’t. They came from somewhere else.”

“That’s not what the credit card company said. The charges were from Ebay.”

“No, Elisa, they did not. You did everything right, changing your passwords and canceling your card. That was good thinking on your part, Elisa! We’re going to be issuing a press release about it in a few days.”

To be honest, I was afraid he was going to pat my knee, and then I was going to have to tell Bucky to attack him. However, with a reassuring nod, he closed his notepad and moved on to another poor soul.

The audience was filing out into the unseasonably hot September night, and that's when I saw her. If only because she was wearing a garment completely unsuited to the weather.

A vintage cheetah coat with otter collar and CUFFS!

"Stop that woman!" I cried, but it was too late. She had slipped out of the double doors and into the night.

A few days later, I received a follow-up email, informing me that Ebay is one of the safest sites on the Internet. Hmmmmph.

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

Karma Strikes...In The Form of Ebay!

DAHLINGS –

As faithful readers of this blog-thing know, my dear dead friend Lana Turner came to me to warn me that something called “Karma” was about to strike. And strike it did!

The morning after Lana’s visitation, I breakfasted, washed, dressed in a new wisp of chiffon and went into my office without a care in the world. I fully intended to write about my lovely evening at Te Casan, a simply marvelous shoe store, for a book signing event.

There I found my new assistant cowering in front of the computer. Her face was as white as a sheet of copy paper.

“What is it now?” I demanded.

“I—I—don’t know how to tell you,” she responded, flinching. “But your Ebay account—somebody hacked it! I knew these weren’t phony emails, so I checked your account, and someone has hacked into it!”

“MOVE!” I said, and pushed her out of the way so that I could sit at the computer. It was but the work of the moment to pull up my email, and see notices that said “Verification of new account with Ebay--credit card on file”. And indeed, they had originated from my (ugh) Ebay account. My heart in my throat, I called the credit card that was attached to the account.

The credit card representative looked into my record, and oui, several small charges had come through Ebay (these are small amounts debited from your card to set up new IDs)! Not only that, the hacker had gone on to max out my credit card in less than 24 hours! And my credit limit is higher than the national debt!

As I sat, gasping with shock, the representative read me the details and I discovered the worst part of it all.

The fiend had used my credit card to buy…vintage.

And not just any vintage! A cheetah coat with collar and cuffs made from otter by Christian Dior from 1967! Two Fortuny gowns! A Jean Louis original evening gown from the 1950s. Mountains of Adrian from his retail line! A dress on sale from Liza Minelli’s collection! A Paul Poiret tea gown! A Claire McCardell “popover” dress in wool! Vintage Oscar de la Renta!

Whoever it was knew my taste, and knew exactly what I had been looking at recently, and where.

(Save for the Liza Minelli dress. Donnez-moi une coupure.)

A wail of anguish broke from my throat, and I fell back in my chair, sobbing. The credit card company had not thought to contact me because I am wont to buy high end vintage for my personal collection on a regular basis. The company could not refund such an enormous loss, only a small part of it. That didn’t matter, it’s only money, but the vintage—

THE VINTAGE THAT I WOULD NEVER OWN!

Suddenly, I heard Lana’s voice in my head: "...as we used to say, what goes around, comes around. And oh, boy, do you have it coming around!"

She was right. Not only was it time to cancel my credit card and change all of my passwords, it was time to start treating the help better. It went against my basic nature, but there it was.

I looked over at my assistant, who had backed up against the wall so hard it looked like she would disappear into the flowered wallpaper. Although it choked me to say it, I said:

“It’s not your fault, my dear, so put it out of your mind. It is my problem and I have to solve it by myself. Please sit down on the divan, you look like you’re going to faint.”

“You’re—you’re not going to scream at me? Throw anything at me? Push me over?” There was disbelief in her tone.

I forced a smile. “No, there won't be any of that any more. I’ve had a warning…somewhat like Marley’s ghost, only shapelier. Why don’t you take the rest of the day off? It will take me forever to straighten out this mess.”

After my assistant had left, I pondered what Lana had told me. It had indeed come to pass…it was the Jean Louis that hurt the most.

And, in all candor, my assistant was wearing a hideous ersatz 1970s chartreuse print dress from Strawberry, and I was deeply grateful that I did not have to look at it for the rest of the day.

But even worse was to come…at “Ebay In Person”.

Ciao,
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog